Owners of the first NSW horse to contract hendra during the 2011 outbreak break their silence about the impact the disease has had on their lives.
After 21 cases of hendra, very few affected horse owners have spoken out about their experience.
Barb and John Michell's horses were the first in NSW to contract hendra during the 2011 outbreak.
The couple, who live at Mcleans Ridges on the state's north coast, agreed to speak for the first time at a special ABC broadcast about the disease.
John kept a journal of the weeks surrounding the outbreak for insurance purposes.
His account can be read online here and provides an insightful, succinct and moving account of the couple's experience.
The Michells moved to the north coast from a farm at Narrabri five years ago.
Now, on a pretty seven-and-a-half acre block just east of Lismore, they keep a couple of quarterhorses for riding and competition.
Or at least they did until July when the hendra virus interrupted their lives.
Barb was home alone when the first horse became ill.
Calypso:
His stable name was Calypso; his registered name Bit of Sonita.
"He was a palomino quarterhorse," says Barb, "a lovely horse, [we] had him for 14 years.
"On the Tuesday ... he came to the stable, he ate his breakfast but he just looked a little bit lethargic ... I thought he must have had a pain in the belly or something.
"It wasn't 'till that afternoon that I called the vet.
Barb says the deterioration of Calypso was 'incredibly fast'.
"Within 24 hours he went blind and was climbing the walls.
"He was so distressed; he couldn't see where he was, he was rearing up trying to get out and crashing into the walls.
In the early hours of the morning, the vet was called back to put Calypso down.
"I just couldn't stand to see the horse in pain anymore," says Barb.
Exposure to the virus:
The lack of some of the more typical hendra symptoms meant no one initially suspected the disease.
"It wasn't till a little bit later," says Barb, "that the vet sort-of started to think things were quite serious."
"The second visit the vet suited up, and he was pretty worried," says John.
Barb and a friend, along with the attending vet had all handled the infected horse without protection.
Barb is calm when she talks about the resulting tests and the weeks of waiting for the results but John says it had them 'terrified'.
Especially when Barb got the flu in the following days.
"That is one of the symptoms of hendra in humans," says Barb, "a flu-like virus."
"The first test is just a baseline test and then after that every three weeks we had another test.
"I actually had one in between because [of] the flu ... they were all a bit worried.
"I was a bit of a social leper there for a while."
Calypso's burial:
John had arrived back around 10am the morning after Calypso was euthanased.
"I went down and had a look at the scene... he was lying on the floor of the stable... it became apparent that we were going to have to dismantle the stable to get him out."
At this stage, John says they still didn't know if Calypso was infected with hendra, but worked in full protective clothing with the help of an excavator.
"[We] dug the hole, took the bucket off the excavator and managed to get a chain around the horse and lift him in the position he was lying on the ground.
"[We] carried him to the hole where one of the departmental vets wanted to take some samples.
"Then we put the horse in the hole and buried him," says John.
"The second one got crook eight days later."
Shiraz:
John says their second horse, Shiraz was initially quite upset about the fact that her mate 'wasn't around to talk to'.
"She looked pretty good for six or seven days. The DPI monitored her twice a day and she was looking like she was alright so they left it to us."
After two days of Barb and John monitoring Shiraz, she too became sick and was confirmed to have hendra.
"She showed signs on day eight, says Barb, "by day ten she was put down as well."
"It was incomprehensible ... it's only now that the reality has sort-of hit."
Barb says she doesn't know for sure if hendra is painful for a horse but feels sure it must be.
"If it attacks everything in your body and everything has a bit of a melt-down; it must be incredibly painful."
Quarantine and support:
John says that had Shiraz survived, the property would have been in quarantine for around a month.
"But once she died we were only in quarantine for, I think it was eight days or less because the virus is only supposed to live for four days."
The couple says the community and the Department of Primary Industries (DPI) were very supportive from the outset.
However John is quick to point out that important medical support was simply not available to the couple in the initial stages of their ordeal.
"I tried to ring doctors and so-on and nobody wanted to know us, there was absolutely no knowledge at all for about 24 hours."
After that period, John says good support was provided but he is still surprised by the initial reactions.
"It was very scary for us because we were after information and they didn't have it."
John believes future cases will receive better care.
"I think everyone's pretty well informed now," he says.
Personal impact:
Barb says the ordeal has had a 'dreadful impact'.
"I certainly won't get over it in a big hurry.
"It was all quite surreal to start with and now I just find it very hard to deal with the loss."
However she hopes to get more horses and at present has a couple of crippled horses she looks after on their block.
Barb says she has heard horse owners accused of being irresponsible about feeding and watering horses under or near fig trees, which may be a feeding site of bats which carry the hendra virus.
"That wasn't the case with me; we had a fig tree and we have no doubt that was the source of the infection [but the horses] were never fed under the trees... and the water was away from trees as well.
"I do believe in culling bats, says Barb, "I'm not a great friend of bats, I must admit."
"The funny thing is," says John, "when I'm driving around I still see lots of horses still living under fig trees so I don't really don't know what the lesson is.
"Why ours and why not the others? I don't know."
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